Firstly…It’s OK to feel Lonely…

According to the latest ONS data 30.9% of those asked, said their well-being had been affected through feeling Lonely in the past seven days.

That’s 7.4 Million of us in GB.

The charity Mind suggests there are many reasons for loneliness – they all seem to involve loss or absence of a support group.

  • Whether it’s feeling isolated from work colleagues.
  • Loss of community contact.
  • Starting University or a new school format.
  • Bereavement.
  • Or maybe just the inability to see friends and family.

We’ve all been affected by the factors that drive loneliness
as a result of the pandemic.

Tips to Combat Loneliness

1 – First recognise that Loneliness is a feeling NOT a fact: we are programmed to focus on the negative – challenge your feelings and make a plan to increase positive contact with others. Then, You guessed it…

Emo Log…write down:

What am I feeling?
What’s this really about?
What can I do right NOW to improve things?
What can I do longer term to resolve this?
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2) Then notice your negative thoughts – are you using thinking errors eg mind reading (no one wants to hear from me), fortune telling (it will be like this for months and months). Try listing things to be grateful for to lift your mood.
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3) Reach out – others are feeling lonely too. Check in more often with friends and family. Then reconnect with old friends. Make dates to meet up with your current network.
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4) Share your feelings – it’s OK to be vulnerable with those we trust and research shows it helps…everyone. They may be want support too. Avoid sharing on social media – you may not get the reaction you want.
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5) Stop Comparing – we have no idea what’s happening behind closed doors it may be a very different story to the picture presented.
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6) Extend your social network – find some news hobbies based on your values. Perhaps a book club, online choir. Or, if you can’t find one maybe create your own by recruiting on a local social media group.
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7) Volunteer – focussing on the needs of others is a great way to forget your own troubles. Think of something that connects you to others. Why not help someone else who’s lonely at the same time?  http://befriending.co.uk
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Here’s a list of UK Volunteering Opportunities

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8) Show up and engage – whether it’s online or virtually. Then take action and whatever you chose to do be reliable with others. Repeated contact builds bonds.
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9) Be curious – “don’t expect perfect and don’t expect applause”. Not everything you try will be great and some might be disastrous. Give it a chance and if then it’s not for you keep looking for something better.
10) Be Compassionate – to yourself and others  – it’s OK if you are finding it hard.

…and if you need any help, just give me a call – I’m here to support you and doing both online and face to face sessions in Chiswick, Acton and Windsor

Here’s a list of useful contacts from the charity Mind

Nichola
Crisis Counsellor, Hypnotherapist and EFT practitioner
www.londonlifesolutions.com
nichola@londonlifesolutions.com
07946 526 838

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